Until I realised of becoming a woman…..
I have awesome memories from childhood being busy playing L-O-N-D-O-N, or that hide and seek, or tag games, or badminton, or P-A-S-S-pass, or Clapping games and so many more that involved laughing, fighting, dumping and dramas of all sorts with friends. I was that child that had friends everywhere, school or outside school, term time or vacation time, all for the world I cared was playing and thankfully my parents did not stop me as much, or even if they did I suppose I always found ways to please them or snuck out anyways.
But, oh dear! What a contrast life can be! Only a few years down the line, I can’t believe how I was growing up to be. Looking back at the early teenage years, the childhood fun had all but dissipated. I wouldn’t be too far off from the truth to blame on the hormones; realising bits growing on your body here and there were not an easy experience, especially when you were not well taught in school nor discussed at home or with friends. I presume it was an ordeal every girl or even boy for that matter went through singularly. Well for myself, I ended up figuring out to the least it is ok to have boobs (which I particularly thought was growing too big and too fast!), or that growing hairs under your armpit was not extraordinary; only may be just exposing them was. Well, whatever it was, I am glad we steered our way through the nuances of life.
Hormones, however, speak only a portion of the truth of my early teenage struggle. I know a lot of my acquaintances would be acutely surprised as they would have not guessed in million years but I always feared of acute embarrassment, or I hated talking about things that were bothering me.
It was not just the hormones kick, but growing up to be a girl, being a part of that community, I was made aware of my expectations from quite early on. Every time I wanted to partake in dance or dramas or go hang out with friends, I was given a million reasons not to. I had several restrictions imposed; no boys, no hangouts, no dance, no this, no that and several no nos. So, within my head, I was holding a truce that would turn into a battlefield someday. On the hindsight though, I wasn’t alone.
Moreover, that combined with a mother who was deprived of education, the emphasis of being a daughter and girl provided with an opportunity of education (quoting my uncles “not just an education but boarding school education” to which I would always smirk) was phenomenal at my household. Being competitive, enjoyed the pressure and built ambitions along the way, taking the opportunity not as granted but on the hard work and talent. So, having moved to the U.K. for the past years, the explicit freedom I have gained have made me reflect my early experiences and realise how lucky I should feel, where I have ample opportunities, freedom, choices and voices.
Truth be told, sometimes looking at some kids, I feel I was brought up in right ways to a certain extent but I don’t necessarily agree with several paternalistic values that besiege our society. Further, to this day, it disappoints me that I had only the few female achievers to look up to and be inspired of.
I always felt that I have to start from somewhere to help those girls and women who did not catch the same happenstance train as I. I find it unfair that some people can get so lucky and some can’t. Nope nope! I am not advocating for all to get lucky but I just feel that everybody should have a same starting point.
So, I hope this blog provides a platform to celebrate achievements of Nepalese women (home and abroad), highlight their plight, share relevant good ideas and causes and hopefully initiate fruitful conversations leading to actions in the future.
Finally, do share away your comments and thoughts 🙂 I am quite liberal, friendly and experienced in taking hits too 🙂
Daughters of The Himalaya 